Grand Littles and Pork Tenderloin and Applesauce

I've been absent for a few days.

I was on a mission.

My mission was to care for my two grand littles for two whole days while their mommy and daddy went to work.

Now I know from experience that a 3 year old and a 2 year old can be exhausting. But hard? Please, I am a woman of experience. I am a woman of years. I am a woman of reason. And I have managed to raise a few littles of my own while keeping plastic bags off heads and running with scissors to a minimum. As far as I know all of my littles have reached kidadulthood with fingers, toes and limbs intact.

Here are my two little darlings on our first morning together. They are having a lovely breakfast of orange juice, dippy eggs and sausages that I prepared for them. It is 6:00 am.

Is God even awake at 6:00 am? Never mind, the littles were hungry and I was up to the task of feeding them.

Later that day the little angels demonstrated their superior art skills for me.

Oh what a wonderful day. We went to the park, visited my parents and had a picnic lunch. A refreshing three hour nap later and we all began preparing dinner for mommy and daddy.

I ended the evening by meeting up with old friends for a cocktail. By the time I arrived back at the littles' house, everyone was tucked in bed and sound asleep.

Until 2:00 am. And 3:00 am. And 5:00 am.

And of course everyone was up by 6:00 am.

Apparently the peaceful ease of my first day "on the job" was a tactic littles use to lull their prey into a false sense of superiority.

The second day:

6:00 am - everyone is awake and in the kitchen.

6:30 am - Mommy and Daddy leave for work.

6:35 am - Little #1 informs me she must go potty.

6:40 am - Little #1 tells me she needs privacy in the bathroom and asks that little #2 be removed.

Little #2 does not want to leave the potty room. Little #1 screeches at a never before heard by human ears decibel rating that SHE NEEDS PRIVACY.

I turn my back for one minute and little#2 begins to cry. She is clutching her arm in pain. This is the conversation that ensues:

Me: Little #1 - did you hit your sister?

Little #1 - no, I bit her

Little #2 - wailing at top of HER lungs

Me: (picking up #2, and carrying out of bathroom) Don't you dare bite your sister!

As I stepped over the threshold of the bathroom I heard the most sickening sound of all. The door slammed and a soft click of the door lock followed. Little #1 had shut the door and locked us out.

Me: #1, you unlock this door this instant.

Silence

Me: #1, can you hear me?

Silence

Me: #1, this is Nani - you come out right now.

Silence

Me: #1, do you want me to call your daddy and have him come home?

Silence

By now I am frantically trying to remember if my daughter-in-law has any chemicals or toxins stored under the bathroom sink that #1 may have gotten in to. I am also looking for something, anything, to stick in the little hole in the doorknob to somehow unlock the door.

Me: #1, can you hear me? Little #2 has stopped crying and is watching me with amusement. It is apparent she has witnessed this little scene before.

7:00 am: #1 has been locked up for 20 minutes. Okay, no time to panic. I am an adult. I am experienced. I am Super Nani... THINK! I cannot call my son and DIL in a panic... can I call the fire department in a panic? Will the FD keep it confidential - I mean do my son and DIL have to know about this little incident?

I decide to try a little psychology (pun intended)

Me: #2, let's go play. Just leave #1 by herself, you and Nani will have so much fun. (said while pretending to walk away from bathroom door)

Silence.

I force myself to wait for a full 3 minutes all the while with my ear pressed to the door.

Me: #1 I've had enough. If you don't come out right now Nani will not take you to your dance lesson.

I hear a a very slight rustling, a turn of a lock and the door swings open.

Little#1: Okay, I'm ready.

Little#2: Hi #1 (giggling)

OMG.

The rest of day went fine but I will never underestimate the power of a little again. At 6:30 pm I head out the door for the long, peaceful drive home.

I slept like a log (not a little) last night.

And seriously, I can't wait until I can do it all over again!

A Cook's Notes: I'm still putting my house back together from the hardwood floor installation and the stair man is coming today to refinish the staircase. Tonight's dinner is a repeat of a previous post: Pork Tenderloin and Homemade Applesauce. Bon Appetite!

Round 1: The Good Cook vs The Fourteen Year Old: Battle of the Bouef Bourguignon

I come from a rather large family (by today's standards). One of six children, third in line to the family throne, #2 of four girls.

I speak with one of my sisters at least several times a week. Sometimes more in times of great need, crisis or glad tidings.

The other day I was speaking to sister #3 and as so often happens, the topic of "what's for dinner" came up.

I told #3 I was on my way to the store to buy ingredients for Boeuf Bourguignon* and she casually mentioned that her 14 year old son Wes had made that very dish in June.

*from here on in known as BB

Huh?

It seems #3 and her merry band have a once a month family tradition of choosing a country, researching the cuisine of that country and then making a dish for the rest of the family.

June was Wes's month and he choose France. Imagine that.

So off Wes went to the library and checked out the following book:

Ohhhh REEEALLLY?

"Yes", said M. "And that's not all. He made BB AND cream puffs from the book.

"Ohhhh REEEALLY, I replied. And how did it taste?"

"Oh, it was wonderful" she assured me.

UH HUH.

"Can I speak with Wes?" I asked.

Soon Wes was on the phone and I was peppering him with questions.

What kind of beef did you use?

Did you dry the beef?

What kind of wine did you use?

Did you use the recipe for brown braised onions like Julia Child said to?

Did you pan saute the mushrooms separately?

What sides did you make?

Do you have photographic proof of this kitchen escapade?

Wes answered all my questions thoughtfully and knowledgeably. But I wanted proof that he had indeed mastered this difficult recipe.

Did you dad take pictures? Will you send them to me?

Herewith photographic evidence of Wes's culinary fete. His mom, serving as Sous Chef, did the knife work for him.

This is Wes's BB:

This is Wes and his mom. Wes is taste testing a cream puff.

I am so proud of him.

I am so proud of my younger sister for teaching her sons to cook.

Does your family have any kitchen traditions? Any budding culinary stars? Any favorite meals that you all cook together?

AND this question is for Wes,

Are You Ready for a Throwdown?

Oh, and for the record, here is my BB: In The Pot

And plated:

James and The Giant Cupcake

This is James. He is fifteen years old and one of Zach's, my 15 year old son's, best friends.

These are James' giant cupcakes.

Recently, my son's friends have been eating dinner with us on a Saturday night.

Typically, it starts like this; around 3:00 on a Saturday afternoon, the phone rings.

Me: Hello? Zach?

Zach: Hi mom.

Me: Where are you?

Zach: In my room.

Me: In my house?

Zach: Yeah. In my room.

Me: Have you fallen and can't get up?

Zach: No, it's me Zach - I'm in my room with Sal.

Sal is another one of my son's friends he "hangs" with. There is Tom and Sal, and Mark, and Ryan, and James. They are very nice boys from the neighborhood and all 15 years old.

Me: You are in your room with Sal? Has Sal fallen and can't get up? Did a dresser fall on you? Are you engaging in CPR on Sal that prohibits you from coming out of your room, walking the 10 feet to the kitchen and conversing in person with me?

Zach: no, we're playing video games, can Sal eat over?

Me: Sure

That's how it typically starts. Five or ten minutes later, another phone call:

Me: Hello Zach?

Zach: Yeah, mom... can Tom eat over too?

Me: Did Tom fall down and can't get up?

Zach: Oh mom...

Me: okay.

This will go on for sometime. This past Saturday, Zach did eventually emerge from his room to ask if James could also eat over. James was coming from a fresh haircut appointment and wanted all his friends to see his new "do" (my words, not theirs)

When James came in the door - I was shocked.

James, for as long as I have known him, has had very long hair that he wore tied back in a pony tail; which in itself is funny. Let me explain. I grew up in the 70's - where long haired "hippies" were the norm. These kids have absolutely no clue that they are imitating a style from the 70's. It would be like me wearing saddle shoes and poodle skirts. But they don't get it. They believe they are the fashionistas and and on the cutting edge. hee-hee. If they would only take a glance at my high-school yearbook how mortified would they be???

Anyway, James came in - another dinner invitation was extended and like so many Saturday night dinners I found myself cooking for 4 to 5 teenagers, my husband and myself. Don't get me wrong, I'm not complaining. I have always tried to have an "open door" policy when it comes to our home. Better to have the kidadults congregate here than elsewhere and besides, it is amazing what you can learn over a table of shared food.

What I learned that night:

James had been growing his hair for a couple of years in order to donate it to Locks for Love; an organization that makes wigs for children undergoing chemotherapy. There is no charge for these wigs. It was finally long enough and in one fell swoop he had it all cut off to benefit children with cancer.

Sometimes kids can amaze us.

So that's why I made James a Giant Cupcake. Because James, in my eyes, has a giant heart.

Devil's Food Cupcakes with Chocolate Glaze and Cream Cheese Swirl.

Makes 6 jumbo (muffin size) or 12 normal size cupcakes.

Paper cupcake liners (jumbo or regular sized)

1/2 cup whole grain pasty flour (I like Hodson Mills whole wheat pastry flour)

1/2 cup all purpose flour

1/2 cup cocoa

3/4 teaspoon baking soda

1/4 teaspoon slat

1 teaspoon vanilla

1/2 cup reduced fat yogurt (I like Face 0% fat Greek yogurt)

1/4 cup skim or 1% milk

1 teaspoon vinegar or lemon juice

2 tablespoons unsalted butter

1/4 cup canola oil

1/2 cup dark brown sugar

1 egg

1 egg white

Glaze:

1/2 cup confectioner's sugar

1 tablespoon and 1 teaspoon nonfat milk (plus more if needed)

2 ounces dark or semi-sweet chocolate, finely chopped

Squiggle:

2 tablespoons cream cheese (I like neufchatel; light cream cheese)

2 tablespoons confectioner's sugar

Place rack in in center of oven and preheat to 350 degrees.

Line cupcake pan with liners. Whisk together flours, cocoa, baking soda and salt in medium bowl and set aside.

Combine milk and lemon juice or vinegar in a small bowl. Let sit for 5 minutes, add yogurt and stir to combine. Add vanilla. Set aside.

Combine butter, oil and brown sugar in the bowl of mixer and mix on high speed until sugar has dissolved, about 1 minute. Add egg and egg white and beat another minute.

Add 1/3 of cocoa/flour mixture, then 1/3 of milk/yogurt mixture, mixing well after each addition. Repeat until all ingredients are combined.

Distribute among cupcake liners.

Bake for 22 minutes for jumbo muffin size or 15 minutes for regular cupcake size or until toothpick comes out clean.

Cool on rack.

Glaze:

Combine confectioner's sugar and milk in small saucepan and heat over low heat until sugar is dissolved. Add chocolate and and stir until melted and smooth. Add milk by 1/2 teaspoons if too thick. While still warm, frost cupcakes.

Squiggle:

2 tablespoons cream cheese. Microwave for 10-15 seconds.

2 tablespoons confectioner's sugar. Stir into cream cheese.

Place in small plastic bag, snip off corner and squiggle on cupcakes.

Don't tell the 15 year old's these are low fat, low calorie, high fiber. They are loaded with love and that's the only thing anyone needs to know; just like Locks for Love and fifteen year olds.